we know what we are, but know not what we may be
by Little Lady Otaku
Summary: She is neither a rose or a lily or a daisy. She is the hedge of thorns keeping trespasses away. Still danger loom from within her country and Susan wonder when life as she knows it will come crashing down. Contain OCs. Edward x OC Pairing.
1. Prologue

**we know what we are, but know not what we may be**

 **A Black Butler Fan Fiction**

 **Female Original Character**

* * *

Summary: She is neither a rose or a lily or a daisy. She is the hedge of thorns keeping trespasses away. Still danger loom from within her country and Susan wonder when life as she knows it will come crashing down.

Warnings: Contain original characters, grammatical errors, typos

Notes: This story contain Canon Character x Original Character pairing

* * *

 ** _PROLOGUE_**

* * *

Today is one of those rare days when the London sky is blue instead of its monotone grey. The weather is fair and agreeable. There is no weather more perfect than this to go to a picnic. A complete opposite from the storm transpired a couple weeks ago. It's almost as if the world had shaken off the remnants of winter to welcome spring.

Now that spring is here, things about to get busy. Aristocrats from all over the land and beyond will gather in London to participate in the Season. After last year's Season, hopefully this year will be a peaceful one.

Ignore the last statement, hopefully this year will be a peaceful one.

It's a distant dream but surely a girl can dream, right?

Susan is not sure how much she believe that. It's just wistful thinking of her part. With her luck, this year will be even more hectic than the last. And that's saying something, considering last year she-

The carriage suddenly jerk, snapping her out of her reverie. Susan look out to the window. Ah, they're here at last.

Susan step out of the carriage and immediately greeted by their family's maid, Sarah, "Welcome back, Miss Susan."

Susan smiled, "It's good to see you doing well, Sarah."

Sarah help her unload the luggage, which consist of two suitcases and a violin case. After seeing the coachman off, the two head inside. Susan's mother Marie appear on the doorstep as Susan lift a suitcase over the steps.

"Susan! Welcome back!"

"I'm home, Mother."

"Oh, it's you."

The three woman downstairs turn around to see the fourth member of the household. Susan's brother Bertram who is a year older than her. He has his hat under his arm. It appears he is going to spend some time away from the house.

"Now, now, Bertram, is that how you greet your sister?" Marie scold her son.

"It's been awhile, brother," Susan smiled at her sibling.

Bertram didn't even bother to look at her as he walk past them.

"Hold it right there, young man!" Marie grab Bertram by the back of his collar. They can hear him choke. "You can go to the library after you help Susan and Sarah with the luggage."

Bertram click his tongue in annoyance. "Fine." Marie let go of him. Bertram put his hat on the coat hanger. He take the suitcase from Sarah and head toward the stairs. Susan shot the other two woman a weak smile before following suit.

Bertram didn't say anything in the short duration of the two of them going upstairs. Of course, Susan is used to this. Her brother open her bedroom door for her. He put down her suitcase on the floor.

"Thank you, brother," Susan call out for Bertram, who is already walking fast as if he couldn't bear another second in her bedroom. "...See you later."

Her brother didn't show any indication that he heard her. Susan stood there watching his back disappear.

It took her a moment to collect herself before Susan enter her room. Her bedroom look no different than how she last saw it a month ago. Sarah would come in for daily cleaning and change her bed and pillow sheet. Everything else is exactly where they are. Susan set down her other suitcase first and then her violin case.

Sitting on the shelves is her beloved doll, Jane. She is a pretty little thing with brown curls and doe eyes. Susan bring Jane with her to the bed. She sit down and look around the room.

Her collection of Austen novels take the top tier of the bookcase. The globe Father bought her for her 13th birthday. The night lamp that give her a little bit of light so she can write at midnight. A landscape painting of the Scottish highlands so Susan never forget where her family came from. The chaise by the window where she would do her knitting or other craft to pass the time.

It's been only a month but it felt longer than that.

"I'm back, everyone."

* * *

It turns out that Susan is not the only who return home from such a long period of time. The eldest child of the family, Charles, show up later in the afternoon. Father picked him up at the train station. The family haven't seen him in months due to his military service. Judging from the shocked expression Mother has, Father and Charles didn't tell anyone of his arrival today.

Before Susan has a chance to greet him, Charles sweep her off her feet. "Su!"

Susan laughs without restraint, something frowned upon in high society. But this is her brother. "Charlie!"

He set her down and give her a kiss on the forehead. He goes to Mother next, whom he pull to a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek, before turning his attention to Bertram.

"I'm glad to see you well, brother," Bertram said diplomatically.

"Now, now, Bertie. None of that hoity toity attitude you learned from school," Charles wrap his arm around his shoulder and fuss his hair. "Did you get taller?"

Bertram struggle to break free but Susan can see the corner of his mouth quirk upwards. "You say that everytime we meet."

"Susan," Father reach out to her. Susan hugs him. "Did they treat you well?"

"Always, Father." And that is the honest truth. She was never mistreated, no matter how demanding her employee can be. One of her coworkers can be a handful but she manages.

They spend the next hour catching up in the living room. Sarah brought over tea and snacks. Charles regal them with the tales of his brother in arms in the Scots Guard. He has been aiming for a promotion for quite some time now. He want to go as high as he can. Mother tease him by asking if he has a special lady in mind. Charles laughed and told them no. A soldier can only get married once he receive permission from his commanding officer. Charles is in no hurry to look for a wife but it never hurt to start saving money now. If marriage doesn't work out for him, that money can be used for his retirement or Susan's dowry.

Bertram told them that he received a recommendation to the university of his choosing. Her second brother want to pursue a career in law. It's respectable, safe, and most important of all, don't require him to stay away from home for too long. Father once served in the military before turning diplomat. Charles decided to follow his footstep. Susan's job is entirely on the whim of her employer.

It's hard not to miss the resentment that is implied in his words. Bertram has never quite let go of the time when their family is scattered to the wind. Father bring Mother and Susan with him to whichever country they assigned him next. Charles and his military adventures. Bertram is left behind in a boarding school in England.

Mother immediately change the subject. "I received a letter from your dearest uncle this morning! He invited us to join him and his family to America!"

"America?" Susan blinked in confusion.

"Yes!" Mother smiles. "It's a trip by boat. Not just any boat, but the maiden voyage of Campania!"

"Campania? As in the newest luxury passenger ship by Blue Star Line? That Campania?" Bertram asked, incredulous.

"The very same!" Mother said eagerly. "It will be a three week trip to New York. The tickets have been paid for. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity!" She then turn to her eldest. "I'm sorry, Charles, but your uncle didn't count you in…"

"It's fine. I understand. The military won't let me go that long anyways… Shame I wouldn't be joining you folks…," Charles let out a dramatic sigh.

"We'll bring you souvenirs," Father said.

Susan can't help but note the irony. Campania, the jewel of the Blue Star Line, is to embark on its maiden voyage so soon after the death of one of its key figure. Patrick Phelps' death was announced in the obituary a few days ago.

"How very nice of Uncle James," That's all Susan has to say in the end. "When is the voyage?"

"The 17th of April."

"That's less than a month."

Mother clap her hands, "We better start packing then," She glances at Charles, "And plan our itinerary while Charles is here."

"And let's not forget to notify our friends and associates of our upcoming trip," Susan adds.

"Yes, yes, of course…"

There is plenty of time to discuss about America so they talk about what they could do while Charles is in London instead. Charles want to check out the newest confectionary by the Funtom Company. Susan wish to visit the Crystal Palace. Bertram want to go boating. Mother want to go shopping. There are also social calls to make.

That night Sarah cooked Charles' favourite food for supper. Father opened a bottle of wine he had saved for special occasions. After supper, the family gather in front of the fireplace. They talk about various things. From something as mundane such as their neighbour's pregnancy to politics with Britain's increasing tension with Germany as the highlight. An odd tension permeates the room once Father brought it up. They were saved by the grandfather clock chiming and Susan bid her family good night. Everyone agree that it's time for each of them to retire for the night and that's that.

Back in her bedroom, Susan changed to her nightgown. But she doesn't head to bed right away. Instead she sit down in front of her desk and pull out paper and pen. She must send this letter first thing tomorrow morning. Her employer must be notified immediately or she will be… displeased. Susan must do everything she can to not earn that person's ire.

Susan wrote her letter, fold it and put it in an envelope. There.

She glance at her vanity. Lying on top of the vanity is a small velvet box. Susan got up from her seat and walk towards the vanity. She pick up the box and open it.

Inside is a badge consists of a red bow with the profile of Her Majesty Queen Victoria, surrounded with brilliant stones.

The Maid of Honours of Queen Victoria are given this upon their appointment. It is a mark of status as well as reminder of duty to the Crown and country. The Double Charles have white in contrast to a Maid of Honour's red.

Susan dearly hope that Her Majesty will be understanding. It's important to spend quality time with your family.

* * *

 **What's this? Another original character fanfic? What about the already other existing stories? I'm so sorry. The plot bunnies just won't stop coming.**

 **The title is taken from Ophelia's line in Hamlet Act IV, Scene 5. Here's the full version of it:**

 ** _"I'm quite well, and may God give you what you deserve. They say the baker's daughter was turned into an owl for refusing Jesus' bread. My lord, we know what we are now, but not what we may become. May God be at your table."_**

 **Also, I want to make it clear that the Maid of Honour in this story is not the same as maid of honour in weddings. It is an actual position in royal households. From what I could gather from my research, the job is pretty much similar to that of a lady in waiting. Only unmarried women can hold such position. Even so, there is historical account that Maid of Honour sometimes run confidential errands for the Queen. One notable example is Harriet Phipps (Charles Phipps' daughter in real life) who had her papers destroyed after her passing for security reasons.**

 **This being the _Kuroshitsuji_ universe, expect Susan and the other Maid of Honours' job to be less... innocuous than they seem. **

**Thank you for reading**

 **Please leave a review**

 **NO FLAME**


	2. Chapter 1

**we know what we are, but know not what we may be**

 **A Black Butler Fan Fiction**

 **Female Original Character**

* * *

Summary: She is neither a rose or a lily or a daisy. She is the hedge of thorns keeping trespasses away. Still danger loom from within her country and Susan wonder when life as she knows it will come crashing down.

Warnings: Contain original characters, grammatical errors, typos

Notes: This story contain Canon Character x Original Character pairing

* * *

 _ **CHAPTER 1**_

* * *

Lord James Innes-Ker and Lady Anne Innes-Ker have seven children in total; Margaret, Henry, Victoria, Isabel, Alastair, Evelyn and Robert. All of them younger than her. The seventh Duke of Roxburghe is Father's older brother. Susan stayed with them at their family seat back in Scotland for a year in preparation for her debut. Her brothers stay with them on every school break when Father wasn't in Britain at the time.

"Su!" Victoria rush towards her.

Susan smiled and bend down to hug her cousin. "Did you get taller, Victoria?"

"Mm-hm! I grow one inch this year!"

The others are more reserved in their greeting to Charles and Bertram. Especially three years old Robert who never meet Charles before.

"Charles, how is military life treating you?" Uncle James clapped his nephew on the shoulder.

"Oh, it's not for everyone, that's for sure. Me though? I find the lifestyle suits me," Charlie grins.

"Hah! It must have run in the family! One in each generation! Maybe Alastair or Robert will take that path!"

"Now, now, dear," Aunt Anne interject, "There will be plenty of time for them to decide."

"Speaking of time, it's best if we board now," Bertram check on his pocket watch.

"Aw, Bertie. Surely we can spare another five minutes?" Charlie pouted. "The luggages are already taken care of. It's not everyday the Innes-Ker clan are in one place. Well, most of them."

"Our mother sent her love to all of you," James said. "We wanted her to come but Mother insisted to stay."

"Yes, Grandmother told me in her letters," Susan told the adults. "And Bertram's right. We best get going."

Indeed, they have start to throw the confettis. It won't take long before they blow the whistle to signal the ship's departure.

Charlie pull her to one last hug. "Stay safe. Bertie is being a pain the arse but he'll take care of you. Look out for him and our parents, okay?" He whispered.

"You're talking as if this will be the last time I'll see you," Susan half joke, half serious.

"I might have just finished reading Moby Dick," Her brother admitted. "But in all seriousness, keep an eye out, okay? It's been a rough couple of years."

Susan tightened her hold on him in response.

After all passengers got on board, the Innes-Ker clan gathered on the first deck. Susan is leaning against the railing, trying to spot her eldest brother amongst the mass. Charlie's parting words did not sit well with her. Did he uncover something in the last minute? Susan has seen too much to pass it off as brotherly concern.

It's a warning. The question is, what is it about?

* * *

Campania promised luxury and they delivered. The two Innes-Ker families will be staying in first class, albeit on different floors. Uncle James brought along two butlers, one maid and a nursemaid. They will be staying at the servant's quarters.

The first class has one restaurant and two cafes. The first class also have access to the Reception Room, Lounge, Dining Saloon, Promenade Deck, Grand Staircase, Smoking Room and Reading & Writing Room. Other facilities include a gymnasium, Turkish baths, swimming pool, and a barber shop. Susan know straightaway that the Reading & Writing Room will be her favourite place on this ship. That or the library. She wonder what her room will look like?

The lounge is packed with people. Susan recognised some of them. Statesmen, nobles, prominent businessmen. They are seated at the largest table available due to their large number. Bertram is telling the boys his experience in Winchester. Henry is listening with rapt attention. Their cousin will enroll at Weston College this fall.

"Which house do you think I will be sorted to, Father?" Henry asked his father.

"Well," Uncle James stroke his moustache. "I was in the Scarlet Fox House. Your Uncle Charles was sorted Green Lion House."

"Why is that?" Evelyn asked.

"Because I'm better than your father at horse riding, fencing, cricket, wrestling…," Father start to count with his fingers.

"Green Lion House accept those talented in martial arts and sports," Uncle James said. "Each house have their own merits and I admit, faults."

"The rivalry between the Houses can be intense. So intense that your father didn't utter a single word to me throughout my first year. Your grandfather shared his disappointment. He was once a Fox too."

It strike Susan funny, all these inter house rivalries and animal symbols. The competitive nature of these Houses is enough to drive two brothers apart. It made them forget that they are boars first before they are foxes or lions.

Henry timidly look up to his father. "Will you disown me if I don't get sorted to Red House, Father?"

"No, son. I wouldn't do that to you," Uncle James promised him. Henry seem to relax after that.

"So why did you go to Winchester instead of Weston, Cousin Bertram?" One question from Cousin Margaret turn all eyes to Bertram.

They don't have enough money to pay for the tuition, but they couldn't tell the children that. It's not like their family suffer from any financial troubles but they would not be able to support Bertram for six years. He will have to drop out eventually.

"Because I wish to go there instead of Weston," Bertram answered. It is also the truth. Winchester may not have the same prestige that Weston hold but it doesn't make them any less respectable.

"What are the Houses there like?" Henry asked eagerly.

"We only have three houses instead of Weston's four. Although there are plans to build more boarding houses to accommodate more students. And we don't use lineage or talents to sort the students. Do we get competitive with each other? Yes. Not to the same degree Weston Houses have though."

Margaret appear to be bored with all these talk about boarding schools and change the subject. "I can't wait to go to Marble Palace," She said with a dreamy expression. "Our Harrods in London is great but I want to see what American stores have to offer."

"I want to go to the zoo!" Alastair declare.

"Zoo!" Little Robert repeat his brother.

Susan chuckle at how adorable her cousins are being at the moment.

"What about you, Susan? Anything in particular you wish to see in New York?" Aunt Anne asks her.

"I wish to see the Statue of Liberty and the East River Bridge."

Seeing the photograph is one thing but to see the real thing in person is another. It took more than a decade for the French to sculpt the statue and then shipped the entire thing to the New Continent. Amazing the feats mankind is able to achieve if they put their mind into it.

Margaret then turn to Father, "Have you been to America before, Uncle Charles?"

"No, I have not. So I am as excited as you are," Father tell his nephews and nieces. As a diplomat, he had travelled to various countries and lived there for a period of time. Mother, her brothers and Susan came along as well. After her brothers each enrolled to boarding schools, it's just the three of them.

Come to think of it, this is the first time Bertram travel abroad with them in years. Last time it was Egypt. Right before he enroll to Winchester. Susan will never be able to forget what happened that year no matter how much she wants to. She doubt Bertram have forgotten either.

 _"Father! Father!" Susan tried to reach out for her father but Mother and the crowd made it hard for her._

 _"Go! I'll hold them off!" Father shouted without looking at her. He is trying to wrestle a knife from their attacker._

 _The whole place is chaos. Everyone's screaming. Susan feel her mother's grip on her tightened. "Charles! I can't find Bertram!"_

 _The man Father is wrestling with looked at her with pure hatred, "Get out of our land, you white devils!"_

Susan take another sip of her tea.

"There will be a party in three days. Can I go? Father? Mother?" Margaret give them the puppy eyes.

Uncle James and Aunt Anne exchange a look. "Well, they don't state that children are prohibited from attending…," Uncle James start carefully. Victoria, Isabel and Evelyn join forces their sister, giving their parents the biggest puppy eyes. Uncle James give them a stern look in return. The battle of wills lasted for no more than 10 seconds before her uncle sigh in defeat.

"Oh, all right. You children can come. As long as you promise you won't stray far from us or your cousins!"

"Oh! Thank you! Thank you Father!" Margaret beamed as her sisters giggled.

Aunt Anne shot Susan and Bertram an apologetic look. "I'm sorry that we agreed so quickly without asking you first."

"It's fine, Aunt Anne," Bertram forced a smile. Clearly he is not happy to be saddled with babysitting duty. Six children (the party is past Robert's bedtime) will be a handful to deal with. "It's only one party. What could go wrong?"

* * *

The group head back outside to the deck area. Cousin Robert didn't come with them for his nursemaid took him away so he can take his nap in his room. Deck chairs and wooden benches line up along the deck, waiting to be perused.

Susan's eyes sweep across the scene. Since this is the deck reserved for First Class, it wouldn't be surprising to run into someone familiar. Her 'wait' period with Her Majesty give her ample opportunities to meet influential individuals. It is unbecoming of a Maid of Honour to not keep up with the latest happenings and those involved. The least she can do is to memories faces and names of those she come across in that place.

The sound of giggles catch her ears. Susan turn around to see a handsome blonde man flirting with two ladies. Her blood run cold once she see his face.

She catch Father's sleeve. "Father," She keep her voice low in order not to alert her cousins. "Isn't that Viscount of Druitt?"

Father follow her gaze and in an instant his eyes narrowed. _"_ _What is that creature doing here,_ _"_ He hissed.

Bertram sneak a glance at the unsuspecting man, "Who is that, Father?"

"Aleistor Chamber, the Viscount of Druitt. He was arrested last year for his involvement in human trafficking. I heard that he bribed his way out of prison… Never thought I'll see he him. Of all places. How in the world he clear his name, I haven't a bloody clue. Best keep your distance from him. All of you."

 _'Money gets you to places,'_ Susan thought as she follow the others.

Their justice system being an utter and complete failure aside… The view is incredible. The lighting is just perfect. Susan wish she has her sketchbook with her to capture this moment… Oh, well. There will be plenty of time for those.

This is a holiday. Susan has to remind herself that. It is insanely lucky for her to receive permission from Her Majesty to leave the country. Queen Victoria even joked in her letter that Susan might meet love during this trip.

Susan recognize a warning when she sees one. Her Majesty warn her (and by association, her parents) to not seek any bachelors. Some eager parents, most often the mothers, would look for potential matches for their marriageable daughters in a voyage such as this one. The queen dislike it when members of her household marry. She view their duty to serve her hold greater importance than matrimony. This apply to both genders. She can be selfish like that. On her first week as a Maid of Honor, Susan is told all sorts of cautionary tales. One of them is a courtier named Henry Ponsonby who courted a Honourable Mary Elizabeth Bulteel. Her Majesty had not been pleased. Those two got married anyways.

A number of Maid of Honour never did marry till the end of their lives. Not that Susan want to find a husband anytime soon. She is too busy for that. She is not so eager to earn the Queen's displeasure on top of that.

Mother bring her and Aunt Anne to sit down on a bench. The children are still admiring the view. Bertram is right behind them, pointing at something. Father and Uncle James are now in deep conversation.

Right. People watching for her then?

As soon as the thought pop in her mind, a girl with pigtails enter her vision. She jump onto a boy, knocking off his hat.

"Elizabeth!" A woman Susan presumed to be the girl's mother approach the two. She looked disapproving. Behind her are a middle aged man and a boy her age. Her husband and son then?

Wait a minute… Isn't that man Marquess Alexis Leon Midford? Head of the Midford House and Order of the British Empire? Then that woman is Marchioness Frances Midford, a distinguished lady whose skill with the sword admired even by the Queen. If memory serves her right, her maiden family is the Phantomhive House…

Marquess Midford pull the boy to a tight hug. His action earn him the chastisement from his family. The boy's face turn her way and Susan catch a glimpse of the eye patch.

The boy who inherit the title of Earl at the young age of 11. The boy from the tragic Phantomhive House. The one who they call the Queen's Watchdog.

 _He is said to wear an eye patch._

Susan never meet that person before but there is only one person in the whole Britain who matches the description.

Ciel Phantomhive.

While Susan still reel from her realisation, the butler clad in black catch her staring. He smiled at her.

A chill run down her spine.

* * *

 **The Inner-Ker family is a real Scottish noble family in real life. Their crest is a boar. So are Henry Ponsonby and Mary Bulteel. Many characters in Kuroshitsuji are based on real people so I will do the same in this fic. Just keep in mind that the portrayal of those characters here are not how they actually are in real life.**

 **There are barely any material about Campania in the manga. Since Campania is based on the Titanic, it will be logical if Campania have similar, if not the same, facilities as Titanic.**

 **The East River Bridge is also another name for the Brooklyn Bridge.**

 **Thank you for reading**

 **Please leave a review**

 **NO FLAME**


	3. Chapter 2

**we know what we are, but know not what we may be**

 **A Black Butler Fan Fiction**

 **Female Original Character**

* * *

Summary: She is neither a rose or a lily or a daisy. She is the hedge of thorns keeping trespasses away. Still danger loom from within her country and Susan wonder when life as she knows it will come crashing down.

Warnings: Contain original characters, grammatical errors, typos

Notes: This story contain Canon Character x Original Character pairing

* * *

 _ **CHAPTER 2**_

* * *

Susan leave her cousins' side for approximately one hour. When she return, she found Elizabeth Midford conversing with Margaret as if they are long time friends. Bertram engage with Edward Midford in what appears to be a boasting contest about their colleges. In the distance, Susan can see the adults interacting, with Earl Phantomhive observing from the sidelines.

Victoria is the first to notice her arrival, "Susan!" She run up to her. Her little cousin pull her to join the rest of the group.

"This is our cousin, Susan. Susan, this is Lady Elizabeth Midford," Margaret introduce them.

Elizabeth Midford curtsies and Susan return the gesture in kind. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Lady Elizabeth."

"Oh! Do please call me Lizzy!" The blonde haired girl smiled, "Lady Margaret here was telling me about you. She speak highly of you."

"Our cousin knows all sorts of things!" Victoria grinned, "She also tell the best stories!"

"I only read them, that's all. The credit goes to the ones who wrote it in the first place."

"She've been all over the place," Victoria continued. "Egypt, Germany, Italy, Greece, India…" She start to list off.

"My father is a diplomat," Susan told Elizabeth. "Wherever he is assigned to, our family goes as well."

"That's incredible!" Elizabeth stares at her in wonder. "This is my first time going abroad, so this is all very exciting for me. Not to mention I will be with my fiance the entire time. We never spend this much time together before."

"Oh?" Susan mentally brace herself. "You are already engaged at this age? May I ask the name of this lucky gentleman?"

"Of course!" Elizabeth then call out for Lord Phantomhive, "Ciel~"

The boy turn at the mention of his name and smiled. His servants follow closely behind him as Earl Phantomhive make his way to where they are standing.

"Ciel, this is Miss Susan Innes-Ker, Sir Charles' daughter. Margaret and Victoria were telling me about her just now."

The young Earl give her a polite smile, "My name is Ciel Phantomhive, head of the house of Phantomhive."

"My name is Susan Innes-Kerr. A pleasure to be acquainted with you, Lord Phantomhive." _It's good to finally able to put a face on the infamous Queen's Watchdog._ "I believe you've met most of my family by now."

"Our youngest brother Robert is taking his nap right now," Isabel filled in the two youngsters. "He's three years old."

"Aaaaw, he must be adorable!" Elizabeth gushes. Then she turn to Susan once more. "Let's get you introduced to my parents and brother, Miss Susan."

Susan smiled, "Thank you, Lady Lizzy. Lead the way."

The children brought her to the adults' side. In a single instant, all attention is turned on her.

"Ah, there she is," Uncle James beckon for her to come closer. "Marquis and Marchioness Midford, this is my niece, Susan. She is currently serving Her Majesty as one of her Maid of Honours."

In the corner of her eyes, Susan saw her brother scowled.

"Nice to meet you, Honorable Miss Innes-Ker," Marquis Midford greet her. Next to him, his wife is measuring her up. Marchioness Midford is not someone to be trifled with, Susan decided. Never do such a thing to a woman whose eyes as fierce as the noblewoman in front of her.

Susan smiles and curtsies "It's an honour."

"And this is our son, Edward." The teenage boy step forward and flash her a polite smile. He tip his head, as etiquette dictates. It appears the Midford siblings get their colouring from their father's side.

Susan bows, "I am happy to make your acquaintance."

"Miss Susan, you're a Maid of Honor to the Queen?" Elizabeth look up to her in awe. "You must be an accomplished lady!"

"Indeed," Marchioness Midford said, "You're awfully young to be a Maid of Honour. When did you had your debut?"

"I had my debut last year, Marchioness," Susan answered.

"And you got appointed straightaway? Most impressive!" Elizabeth praised her.

"I am still lacking in experience, I'm afraid. Thankfully, I have my seniors to guide me," Susan replied humbly. "I strive to follow their example and give it my all to serve Her Majesty."

"You are being humble. Being a Maid of Honour is no easy feat to achieve," Earl Phantomhive said. He is definitely sizing her up now. She could not fault him for getting suspicious. Earl Charles Grey's past conducts at the Phantomhive manor had been anything but proper. That and the Queen was displeased with the young Earl for reasons Susan don't know.

He might try to interrogate her if he manage to get her alone. Maybe. That would be an interesting conversation to say the least.

"Oh, Miss Susan! I wish to hear more about it! It is such an honor to directly serve the Queen!" Elizabeth clasped her hands together. "Mayhaps you can tell us over tea and cakes? They have a cute cafe in the first class!"

Her female cousins give her the puppy eyes. They share Elizabeth's enthusiasm to hear more about her experience as Maid of Honour.

"I am intrigued as well," Earl Phantomhive smiled innocently. How can he smile like that? The boy is anything but innocent. Earl Phantomhive is quite the actor.

Damn, no way out for her now.

"Why, of course," Susan nodded. "If your parents and mine would have it, Miss Lizzy...," She glanced at the adults present.

The Midford couple is quick to agree. Susan is the niece of a respectable duke. They see no harm in Elizabeth making acquaintance with her. Her parents doesn't seem to mind, judging from their expression. Her uncle and aunt give her an encouraging look.

That settles it then.

"How about we gather at the Verandah Cafe at four o' clock? Just in time for afternoon tea," Earl Phantomhive's butler, the black haired one, suggests.

"Mm! That is an excellent idea, Sebastian!" Elizabeth smiled.

The butler accept the praise with a bow.

"Would you like to join us ladies, Cousin Henry? Cousin Alastair?" Susan ask her boy cousins.

"No, I wish to stay with Cousin Bertram and Lord Edward. They are telling me all sorts of things about dormitory life!" Henry answered.

"Lord Edward is a knight! The real deal!" Alastair looks like he is short from bouncing up and down.

"Ah…," Edward Midford hesitate for a moment, "Actually, I wish to join my sister for afternoon tea later." He shoot Earl Phantomhive a brief glare. "But don't worry. We will have plenty chances to talk," He added quickly to appease her boy cousins.

"I'll hold you to that, Lord Edward," Henry said seriously.

Lastly, Susan turn to Bertram, "Brother, are you coming?"

Bertram put his hands behind his back, "I'm afraid I will not be able to join you this afternoon."

And there's that.

* * *

They went separate ways afterwards. Everyone except her haven't had the chance to check out their cabins, so they look forward for it. Susan and Bertram follow their parents from behind. Father whisper something to Mother that made her giggle. She then hug Father's arm tighter. The siblings share a brief look of mutual suffering. Susan supposed it's only natural for their parents to be excited. This is their first holiday in years.

"Here we are," Father gestures to the cabin he will share with Mother. It is right next to Bertram's. Hers is right across his.

Father and Mother enter their cabin, leaving the siblings to stand there in the hallway. Susan about to head inside her own cabin when Bertram call out to her.

"Oi, you," Bertram glared at her. "Outside of spending time with Uncle James and his family, keep your distance from me. With you hogging the attention all the time, you made it difficult for me to make connections of my own."

Susan keep her expression neutral, "I understand."

Bertram studied her for a moment before scoffing and enter his cabin.

Susan linger in the hallway for a bit longer before she enter her cabin.

Others would frown at the way Bertram treat his own sister. They would sympathize with her and scold her brother. That is why they do this in secret. If their parents noticed, well, they should have intervened. Their older brother definitely noticed but their distance is too great. Susan suspect a part of him want them to resolve this on their own since they are old enough.

It's' almost like a sick game between the two of them.

Susan let it happen anyways. Because it is her fault that drive Bertram to this point.

* * *

Eleven (ten) pairs of eyes are focused on her. Four of them are her girl cousins, two pairs belong to the Midford siblings, Earl Phantomhive, and finally, the eyes of the three servants who accompanied them. The girls' butler, Elizabeth's maid and Lord Phantomhive's two servants.

"A Maid of Honour," Susan starts, "attend to her Her Majesty the Queen. She is to carry out every task given to her. A Maid of Honour is part of the Royal Household, going wherever the Queen goes. There are exception, of course. Naturally, they don't just let anyone do it. There are requirements that must be fulfilled in order to qualify as one. In the end, it is the Queen herself to have the final say." Susan take a sip of her tea to allow the others to process this.

"Prospects will be tested and questioned. This goes without saying, but a Maid of Honour must have the make up of what it means to be a lady. And beyond that. Well mannered, educated, proficient in music and sociable. She must has excellent penmanship as well, because sometimes she will write a note or two on behalf of the Queen. A Maid of Honour should also practise some form of craft, because Her Majesty dislike idle hands. She is fond of knitting."

"Really?" Victoria blinked in surprise.

"Really," Susan confirms.

It is not well known to those outside of the palace, Queen Victoria would sit down with Charles Phipps and they do all sorts of crafts together. Susan is not ashamed to admit that the nobleman is better than the rest of the ladies in these kind of activities.

"Another aspect looked for in a Maid of Honour is her voice. Not only she will sing if the Queen request it, she must also read for Her Majesty. Clarity, intonation, fluency… Those qualities are important. Sometimes you will read foreign texts so knowledge in language is a must. A Maid of Honour must speak fluent French and German. That's the bare minimum. It will be even better if she can speak Latin to a degree as well. Various royals from all over the continent come to England every year, it is also a Maid of Honour's job to entertain them during their stay."

"But that means you've met a prince!" Isabel looked at her in awe. Then her expression shift to a dreamy one. "What were they like? Are they handsome?"

Elizabeth also look at her in awe "So many royals in one place… I can't imagine what it is like. It must be so grand!"

"Oh, they are handsome, all right," Susan chuckles. Some of them anyways. "Last year I attend to Kaiser Wilhelm's family. And before you ask, no, I didn't speak to him beyond a few words. I spent most of my time with his wife, children and their attendants who followed them from Germany."

Now that was nerve wracking. Susan can't for the life of her imagine what it was like for her seniors during the Queen's Golden Jubilee. They invited 50 kings and princes from all over Europe. Count in their wives, children and personal attendants… Not to mention their own nobles attending… It was a historical occasion for their country. A celebration most grandiose is to be expected. But it must had been _taxing_.

Even so last year was hectic as well. Germany saw three Kaiser on the throne in the span of one year. Jack the Ripper plagued London for months. Italy and Spain signed a peace treaty. Cecil Rhodes is granted a charter for British South Africa company. In the United States, Congress for Women's Rights was organised. Tchaikovsky's 5th Symphony premiered in St. Petersburg, Russia. Oh, and Queen Victoria left behind her Maid of Honours and other attendants when they spectated a choir to judge a cooking competition back in December.

If Susan remember correctly, the Funtom Corporation also took part in that competition and won.

"Oh, I have no idea at all!" Elizabeth looked at her with wide eyes. "Miss Susan, you must be such an accomplished lady to be chosen as a Maid of Honour. Please, do tell us more!"

So Susan regal her audience the tales of her wait periods with the Queen. Accompanying Her Majesty to Balmoral Castle in the Autumn, a month at the palace and of course, the royal visit by the German royal family.

Earl Phantomhive looked particularly interested with the last subject. Edward Midford give her a look akin to respect.

"You are not allowed to keep a diary?" Elizabeth asked in disbelief when Susan told them that tidbit.

Susan nodded. "Yes. It is one of the many rules a Maid of Honour must abide to. They actually put up a list of rules on our bedroom doors. The palace is a strict place."

Her girl cousins make faces at this. They have heard of their grandmother's tales of being the Queen's Lady of the Bedchamber and lady in waiting. Grandmother Susanne give them the sanitised version, giving them the impression that the life in the palace is a grand one. Susan is made aware that not everything in that place is as glamorous as it appears to be. A point hammered home once she is officially appointed as Maid of Honour. Literally. They actually hang up the list on their door.

"What about romance?" Margaret lean forward eagerly. "Surely there are many dashing gentlemen in the palace. Have someone catch your eye, Cousin Susan?" The girls then giggled.

Susan smiled indulgently at them before shaking her head. "I have no such thoughts in mind, much less over a person."

The girls give her disbelieving looks.

"But you're old enough now, Cousin Susan," said Isabel.

"And still young enough. And you, little lady, are a bit too young to think about these sort of stuff."

"Lady Elizabeth and Earl Phantomhive are engaged," Victoria points out.

Elizabeth blushes prettily while her brother scowls.

"Everyone's case is different," Susan replies. "That being said, Lady Lizzy get along well with Earl Phantomhive."

"I guess part of it is because we grew up together," Earl Phantomhive speak for the first time. "We know each other well." He and Elizabeth exchange a smile.

 _'Do you really?'_ Obviously, Susan didn't voice this out loud. That would be inappropriate and rude.

"So when will you two marry, Lady Lizzy? Earl Phantomhive?" Evelyn, the youngest, asked innocently.

Earl Phantomhive choke on his tea and Elizabeth blushed harder. Edward Midford looked scandalised. Behind the young earl, his butler is stifling his laughter.

"Of course they will marry after Lady Lizzy's debut, silly!" Isabel scold her sister.

"My mother doesn't think I'm ready yet. At least, not for another year," Elizabeth admitted.

"No!" Edward said loudly, startling her cousins. "I have yet to acknowledge him as my brother-in-law!" He glares at his cousin, making him uncomfortable.

"Brother! You're scaring our guests!" Elizabeth scold him.

Edward take one look at her frightened cousins and in an instant, his expression turn remorseful. "I apologise for my manner, ladies. It is unbecoming of a gentleman. I didn't mean to scare you. It's just that this engagement is a sore topic for me…"

"I look forward for your debut, Lady Lizzy," Susan said, hoping to break the tension caused by Edward, "Hopefully I have my wait period by that time. I would love to see you in your debut dress."

"My sister will undoubtedly be the most loveliest of them all," Edward said dotingly.

Elizabeth smiled back. "Thank you, Miss Susan! What was your debut like?"

And then the topic turn to debutante. Her cousins relaxes. Susan tell them about her debut experience. Her cousins have heard this story before, though letters and later on in person, but they never get bored.

Before any of them realised, an hour has passed. It's time for them to go separate ways again.

"Oh, I wish we have more time," Elizabeth said morosely, "Your companies are delightful. And I still have so _many_ questions."

Susan smiled. "Thankfully, we have plenty of those. This is only the first day. We can always arrange another meeting. I'm sure my cousins would love to spend more time with you all."

Margaret, Victoria, Isabel and Evelyn looked give Elizabeth hopeful looks.

"Of course!" Elizabeth answer readily. Her cousins beams.

Susan then turn to Edward, "My boy cousins have taken a shine on you, Lord Edward. I hope you wouldn't mind if they want to spend more time with you."

"It is all right, Miss Susan," Edward smiled, "And I already promised them. A gentleman must not break his promise."

"Then I believe our families will see a lot of each other throughout this voyage."

* * *

Susan changed to her evening wear for dinner. Once finished, she step outside her cabin and to the hallway. Bertram is already there, wearing a different suit. They waited for their parents in silence. Charles and Blanche eventually emerge from their cabin. Together they head out to the restaurant.

Dinner was lovely. The food is delicious and everyone is in a good mood.

Margaret spot the Midford family across the room and wave at them. Elizabeth waved back.

After they had dessert, the children were escorted back to their cabins. The adults decide to stick around a little bit longer. Susan told them that she wish to go to the Reading & Writing Room. They let her go.

The Reading & Writing Room is as lavish as the rest of the First Class facilities. It was built for the ladies to retreat to after dinner. You can borrow books from the Lounge and Library and read it here. And as the name of the room suggest, you can write letters or telegram in this room. The interior is decorated in pastel, probably to make it more appealing to the ladies.

And Susan has the entire room to herself. There is no one here but her.

Susan walk up to the windows. It is easy to picture the sunbeam lighting up the room. The architect pick a good spot. Since it's dark outside, the only thing Susan can see is her own reflection on the glass.

She hear the door creak and Susan turn around.

Earl Phantomhive, his black haired butler and unique looking footman.

"Good evening, Earl Phantomhive," Susan greet him first.

The boy smiled at her as the butler closes the door behind them. "Am I interrupting you, Miss Susan?"

"Oh, no. I'm just admiring the room for now," Susan leave the window side and take a seat on one of the plush chairs.

Earl Phantomhive take a seat right across her.

"Are you sure Lady Lizzy is alright with you leaving her side so early? Most of the guests are still in the dining room." From what she've seen so far, Elizabeth Midford is particularly attached to her fiance.

"I already excused myself," Earl Phantomhive answer. "Would you like to have tea with me, Miss Susan?"

Susan smiled. "I'll take you up on that offer, Earl."

"Sebastian," Earl Phantomhive command without looking. Sebastian is already making preparation in the background.

They waited until tea is served before Susan speak up. "Is it bold of me to assume that you wish for a chance to speak to me without unwanted audience?"

Earl Phantomhive's smile widen. "As expected from someone who is part of the Royal Household, you are sharp."

"Thank you for the praise, Earl Phantomhive," Susan set down her teacup. "I hope this conversation will not take too much time. I promised my cousins that I will read them bedtime story."

"Oh, it won't take long," Earl Phantomhive promises. "I only wish to get to know you better."

"You mean, what am I doing here? Why, it's the same as you, Earl. For a holiday. The Queen had given me permission." Susan tilt her head. "Or are you here for an entirely different reason?"

"My butler caught you staring at me earlier today." Ah, so he has no intention to tell her anything.

"I apologize. It was rude of me. It's just that... It's nice to finally be able to put a face on the figure I have heard so much about."

"Oh?"

"Earl Grey was quite vocal with his displeasure towards you."

Last month, he was given an assignment by the Queen. Susan don't what happened but Earl Grey returned to the palace in a sour mood. All she knows is that it has something to do with boy sitting next in front of her. When the death of George von Siemens and Patrick Phelps is announced, it wasn't hard to connect the dots. Naturally, they would cover up the circumstances surrounding the deaths of these two men. Whatever suspicion Susan has, she keep it to herself. Nothing good will come to fruit if she ask.

Something flashed in Earl Phantomhive's eye when she mentioned the name. "Is that so?"

"Yes."

"You are familiar with the Double Charles then?" He further question her.

"We work together. And in similar vein, we all serve the same master."

"So you are aware of the nature of my work."

"As much a Maid of Honour is allowed to know."

A Maid of Honour is never present whenever the Queen is having an audience with the Watchdog, with a few notable exceptions. Hence why Susan and the Earl never met until now. Last year he didn't make a single visit to the palace. She is aware of his audience back in February, however.

"Excuse me, milady," Sebastian lean in to refill her tea.

Susan look up to the man. His skin is unnaturally pale. She could have sworn that his eyes is red. Then again, it might be a trick of the light. Still, it's rare to see a person with russet coloured eyes.

"Are you the same Mr. Sebastian Michaelis who took part in the cooking competition last December?"

The butler smiled. "Yes, I am."

"I had the opportunity to taste your curry bread. Such an innovative dish. The ladies at the Royal Salon love it."

"I am honoured," Sebastian bow to her.

Susan turn her attention to the young earl and smiled. "You have quite the exceptional butler, Lord Phantomhive. Are all servants of the Phantomhive House like Mr. Michaelis here?"

The Earl's eye twitched. "...In their own way."

"Earl Grey have also praised the culinary skills of your chef. Not the easiest must take pride in them."

Till these day, Susan never meet someone with an appetite as big as he has. It's as if his stomach is a bottomless pit.

Speaking of servants…

"I'm sorry," Susan turn to the footman, "But I don't think I catch your name?"

The footman looked startled. He must have not expected that. "My name is Snake," He introduce himself once he recover his bearings. Then his voice drop a few octave "...says Donne."

"Donne?"

A snake slither out of his jacket. So this man can communicate with snakes. Double Charles weren't kidding when they say the servants of Phantomhive House aren't ordinary people.

"Ah, so your name is Snake and your friend here is Donne. It's nice to meet you both."

Snake looked even more surprised now. "You're not afraid of us? ...says Donne."

"I'm sure Lord Phantomhive wouldn't let you come along if you couldn't be trusted around ordinary folks," Susan says. "Also, are you possibly named after John Donne?"

"Yes! ...says Donne."

"Oh…," The bookish side of her is delighted. "That's a wonderful name." Susan smiled at the footman who is now blushing.

Earl Phantomhive coughed.

"Oh, I apologize, Lord Phantomhive. I didn't mean to ignore you like that. Is there anything else you want to ask me?"

"Have you seen anything suspicious on this ship?"

Ah, so he's here for work.

"I'll give you something better. Does the name Aleistor Chamber sounds familiar to you?"

Earl Phantomhive looked genuinely taken aback at the mention of the name. He definitely know him then.

"It's honestly surprising and terrifying how a man like Viscount of Druitt readily welcomed back by high society," Susan take a sip of her tea. It's as if everyone in high society have forgotten that he was involved in a crime. It was all over the newspaper. That also further prove her disillusionment with the so called 'nobles'. "I saw him earlier today. I don't know his whereabouts at the moment but I will steer clear from him."

"Thank you for the information, Miss Susan. I appreciate it."

"Don't mention it. I'll inform you if I find anything else."

Earl Phantomhive raise an eyebrow. "You'll help me?"

"Not without price," Because she is not an idiot. "The first intel I gave to you in good faith. I only wish for my family to be safe. I don't want anything that could ruin our vacation to happen. My cousins have been looking forward for this trip. I'll stay out your way even. In exchange, whatever happens on this ship, you help my family. And if you find evidence that something dangerous is about to take place, you will inform me."

The earl make eye contact with his butler. A silent conversation pass between them.

Earl Phantomhive turn to her and extend his hand. "It's a deal."

Susan clasp his hand. "It's been a pleasure talking to you, Earl Phantomhive. And now I have to take my leave." She let go of his hand. "I hope whatever you find satisfy you."

* * *

"What do you think, milord?"

"She knows about my status as the Queen's Watchdog and readily offer to help. At least she's smart enough not to give it for free."

"She is also not frightened at the sight of us. ...says Donne."

"The Viscount's presence on this ship is already enough to make her wary. Can't blame her for that. Me being here only solidify her suspicious that something is amiss. Now she want to take all precaution to ensure her family's safety. She is quick to take action, I'll give her that. I certainly won't say no for an extra pair of eyes."

"You don't think she is here under the Queen's order?"

"I passed the test, didn't I? Even if that were the case, we'll simply keep an eye on her for now. Since she is one of the Queen's people, any misfortune that befall on Miss Innes-Kerr will certainly draw attention. No action will be taken against her… Unless she do something that warrant it."

"Yes, milord."

* * *

 **More details about what a Maid of Honour does. There are so many requirements it sounds unrealistic... But those are the standards back in the day. At least during Queen Victoria's reign that is. After her husband ascension as King of England, Queen Alexandra changed some of the rules.**

 **In Victorian era, girls make their debut to society as early as fifteen. However, girls can only debut after her parents decide that she is ready for it, both physically and emotionally.**

 **Thank you for reading**

 **Please leave a review**

 **NO FLAME**


	4. Chapter 3

**we know what we are, but know not what we may be**

 **A Black Butler Fan Fiction**

 **Female Original Character**

* * *

Summary: She is neither a rose or a lily or a daisy. She is the hedge of thorns keeping trespasses away. Still danger loom from within her country and Susan wonder when life as she knows it will come crashing down.

Warnings: Contain original characters, grammatical errors, typos

Notes: This story contain Canon Character x Original Character pairing

* * *

 _ **CHAPTER 3**_

* * *

A Maid of Honour must be up and ready before the Queen start her day. So she and her fellow Maid of Honour rise early to prep themselves before go to attend to Her Majesty. Susan is an early riser so this is not a problem. Father already drilled into her and her brothers since a young age to wake up at the slightest disturbance and to be alert. A leftover from his military days. One of the many things Charles Innes-Ker pass down to his children.

Susan study her reflection on the mirror. Her brown hair is curled and neatly tied with a black ribbon. She picked a blue jacket and skirt for the day. She give herself a satisfied nod before heading out.

Susan walk out of her cabin the same time Bertram open his cabin door. Judging from the sweat on his forehead and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, he had spent some time at the gymnasium. Susan had heard that the place have the latest exercise equipments. No doubt Bertram want to try his hands on them as soon as possible. His expression soured the moment he lay his eyes on her.

"Good morning, brother," She greets him still.

Bertram didn't return her greeting and enter his cabin.

A sigh almost escape her lips but Susan hold it in. It's too early to get upset. She still has a whole day ahead. _It's only the second day._

Susan went to the restaurant in a rather low mood. Thankfully, her cousins' high spirits prove to be infectious and Susan perked up considerably by the time breakfast end. It is a fine day so everyone agreed to go to the deck to enjoy fresh air. It appears many of their fellow passengers share the same idea so socialisation is inevitable.

The grownups did most of the talking. Susan will occasionally make a comment or two. Bertram is determined to make most of their time on this ship to make connections. College is not even started yet but her brother already thinking that far ahead. Bertram made no mention of it so far but Susan will not be surprised if he seek an accelerated course.

Susan memorized the names and faces of those who approach them and filed them in her mind. She will inquire to the adults about them later to prevent any future mishaps. The passengers of the First Class are a multitude of personality, nationality and occupations. So far they have met military men, engineers, business owners and so on. There are British, Americans, French, Swedish, German, just to name a few.

"Look! A ship!" Alastair pointed.

Susan let her cousins drag her away from the adults and the railings. A ship is heading to the direction opposed as Campania. It is too far for her to make out but she thinks it's a freighter.

"Where do you think it come from?" Victoria ask to no one in particular.

"Maybe it's from the States, heading to Europe," Henry suggests, "or maybe it's a Canadian ship."

"I wonder what kind of cargo they have," Margaret lean against the railing to get a better look.

"Maybe they found treasures from the Caribbean Sea and now bringing them back to Europe," Alastair said.

"Or Africa!" Victoria chip in. "There could be statues from Egypt in their cargo. Maybe even something from the pyramids."

"Maybe it's stuffed animals instead," Evelyn pitch in. "Or even live animals for London Zoo."

"What do you think, Susan?" Isabel asked her. All eyes turn to her.

Susan smiled. "I don't know to which country the ship belonged to… And every thing you suggest could very well be true. Or maybe its a British ship making its way back home. Who knows?"

"Then what do you think the ship's cargo could be?" Isabel presses on.

"The passengers on board," Susan answered. "Each and every single person on that ship has a story. And I think that's exciting."

On that ship there might be a young sailor eager to see the world. On the flip side, it can be a youth who had seek riches in the New World and found it, now on their way home. Similarly it could be an elderly who haven't come back to their homeland for decades. Maybe there is woman on her way to her fiance's country, bringing her dowry with her on board. Perhaps even an eccentric on the mission to travel the world like Jules Verne's Mr. Fogg. The possibilities are endless. Something about it touch her heart.

"I still think that lions are better," Alastair said, earning Susan's chuckle.

* * *

Her cousins have left to go swimming. Because Susan didn't bring a bathing suit with her, she decide to sit this one out. Still, it is a novel concept, to go swimming at the ocean but not necessarily in the ocean. The engineers that helped in the construction of Campania came up with a design that allow Campania's plumbing to pump seawater. There's even a special technology to distill seawater in case of emergencies.

Since Susan will not be joining her cousins, Aunt Anne invited her and Marie to join her at the Turkish Baths. They charge 4 shillings per person. They designed the facilities in the style of a Turkish hamam, with blue-green tiles and bronze lamps. It reminded Susan of her time at Constantinople. The experience also give her a chance to marvel at the installations.

If British military ships have this kind of technology, winter won't pose too much problem…

Crack

"Ow!"

"You have a lot of tension in your body, Miss," said the masseur as she let go of her.

Susan smiled at the masseur, though it come off as forced since she is still feeling it. "Uh… Thank you for that."

She exit the Shampoo Room and onto the Cool Room. Her mother and aunt are still in the Hot Room. Susan hope those two won't stay inside that room for too long or one will get lightheaded. In the Cool Room, visitor step into a pool to cool themselves off.

While relaxing, Susan make a small talk with one Madam Lucille Samuel. The woman appear to be around her mother's age but she might be a little older. She used to be an opera singer before she retire to marry. Madame Samuel take this trip not just for holiday purposes but also to seek health treatment in New York. Before Susan can ask, she already list a string of complaints about her health. Madame Samuel seem to be expecting Susan to express worry for her wellbeing after she told the younger girl of her predicament. Some of the symptoms Madame Samuel sounds exaggerated to Susan. She simply express her hope that the treatment Madame Samuel seek will be successful. Madame Samuel is pleased with her response and told Susan that there are like-minded people aboard this ship. They will hold a meeting soon. It's too bad that Susan is not a member. Maybe once the organisation gain more recognition in the future, Susan will go to them for treatment as well.

Susan can only give Madame Samuel a non committal answer.

Before leaving, Madame Samuel told Susan that she greatly enjoyed her talk with her and wish she could spend more time with her. She ask Susan if she would accept her invitation for tea in the near future. Susan smiled and told her that she will think about it. She need her family's approval first. Not to mention she has her cousins to look after for. However, Madame Samuel's invitation is greatly appreciated. Madame Samuel looked pleased with her answer.

Madame Samuel left the Cool Room at the same time her mother and aunt enter.

Susan regroup with the rest of her family at the restaurant during lunch. Her cousins looked tired but happy from their swim.

After lunch is over, Susan pull her father to the side. She told him of her meeting with the Queen's Watchdog last night and what had transpired at the Turkish Bath.

"The Watchdog never do anything without purpose," Her father told her. "Something is about to take place in this ship. Something that would attract the attention of the Watchdog. You may continue your cooperation with Earl Phantomhive. But be careful. Don't let yourself be taken advantage of."

"Yes, Father."

Susan head back to her cabin afterward. She hasn't decided what to do next. Should she start writing letters to her co workers back home? Or should she retrieve her drawing set so she can sketch outside? Reading a book sounds lovely as well. Which reminds her. Susan has yet to take a look at the library.

No. Not the library. Earlier at breakfast Bertram told everyone at the table of his desire to see the library. She can go to the library on another day.

The Reading and Writing Room still have a collection of books waiting to be perused. That will do for now.

Susan entered her cabin. She barely sit down for five seconds when there is a knock on her door. To her surprise, her visitor is none other than Earl Phantomhive's Butler.

"Good day, Honorable Miss Innes-Kerr," He bows.

"Good day, Mr. Michaelis," Susan return his greeting.

"My master dispatched me to give you a message. He and Lady Elizabeth wish to invite you for tea this afternoon. The time and place is the same as yesterday. Your cousins have confirmed their participation. Their guardian have given their consent as well."

"Thank you for the invitation. Please tell His Lordship and Lady Elizabeth that I will join them this afternoon."

The butler's smile widen. "Lady Elizabeth will be pleased to hear that. I shall take my leave."

The butler take his leave.

Susan look at her pocket watch. There is still another two hours before the appointed time. It's best for her to change her clothes first. Tea with an Earl and his fiancée require an outfit fit for the occasion. For her second outfit of the day, Susan wear a light yellow dress with mauve ribbons and cravat.

She spend the next one hour and a half writing letters.

Thirty minutes before the clock strikes four, Susan left the cabin. She informed her parents (who have returned to their own cabin an hour ago) that she will be at the Verandah Cafe. Bertram is not in his cabin, presumably at the library like he said earlier. She went to pick up her cousins and head to the cafe together.

When Susan arrive at the cafe, Lady Elizabeth is already seated with her fiance... Her brother Edward is present as well.

Susan curtsies before everyone. "Good afternoon, Lady Lizzy, Earl Phantomhive, Lord Midford."

"Lords and Ladies of Innes-Kerr!" Elizabeth greet them. "Please do be seated!" Earl Phantomhive's footman pull the chair for her. Susan is seated next to Lord Midford.

"Good afternoon, Miss Innes-Kerr," Lord Midford flash her a smile.

Susan return the smile in kind, "Good afternoon, Lord Midford."

After they are done with the pleasantries, the girls launch to a discussion about New York. They gush over _Macy's_ , an upscale department store in New York. It can't be helped that they compare it to London's _Harrods_ or Paris' _Printemps_. Earl Phantomhive express his wish to conduct a market research while in New York, which earn him a scolding from Elizabeth for always thinking about work. Elizabeth is quickly placated after her fiance promised to accompany her shopping. He'll even let her pick an outfit or two for him. And just like that, the topic turn to fashion.

" _The_ Nina Hopkins designed your dress?!" Margaret gasp in surprise.

Elizabeth beamed. "Indeed! Ciel's clothes are tailored by Hopkins' Tailor Shop as well!"

"How envious~"

"You know, Miss Hopkins actually designed matching outfits for Ciel and I. As luck would have it, Ciel brought it with him. We're going to wear the set for the party tomorrow!"

"How romantic!" Victoria gushes as the rest of her sisters giggle. "You two are so close! I hope I can get along with my future husband like that."

Victoria's words make Elizabeth blush. Lord Phantomhive clear his throat. A vein start to become visible on Lord Midford's forehead.

Noticing this, Susan quickly steer the conversation to another direction. "This is your first time leaving Britain, yes? Lady Lizzy? Lord Midford?"

"Eh? Ah, yes. This is our first time going abroad," Lord Midford nodded.

"This is actually Ciel's second time to America," Elizabeth told them.

"This is my first time going to New York though," Lord Phantomhive adds.

"We will go see the lions at the zoo!" Alastair announce to the whole table, earning chuckles from everyone.

They talk about sightseeing for awhile. Elizabeth pressed Lord Phantomhive to share his experience in America. He refuse to tell them anything, informing them that it was a business trip. The look on the Midford siblings' faces changed and they drop the subject.

They talk about sports next. The boys eagerly ask Lord Midford about the Green Lion House, one of the four houses of Weston College. Lord Midford patiently answer each and every question. He informed them that he is a regular in Green Lion's cricket team. On top of that, he is also a member of the fencing club. Susan thought it's a bit obvious that a child of the Midford Marquisate would join the fencing club. Elizabeth participated in competitions as well, according to her fellow Maid of Honours and Double Charles.

Suddenly, Lord Midford's attention turn her.

"Your brother told me that he is the captain of the rowing club in his college."

"Oh?" Susan put down her teacup. "You talked to my brother?"

"Yes, we met at the gymnasium this morning. I told him that he has impressive strength and technique. The captain of Weston's rowing club is a Green Lion. An upperclassman of mine. He has high opinion of Mr. Innes-Kerr as a fellow sportsman."

Susan beams. "Thank you. My brother takes pride in his captaincy. He wish to join again in university."

"Then his rivalry with my upperclassman shall continue then. Unless they end up in the same university." His words got her to chuckle.

The younger ones keep the conversation going. Though Susan has a feeling that Lord Phantomhive is bored. He only answer when asked. He appear to be more interested in his tea. Perhaps their chosen topics are a bit too juvenile for his taste? That or he just don't enjoy this kind of social activity. The young Earl is known for his reclusiveness. A complete contrast to the outgoing Lady Elizabeth Midford.

Time pass quickly when you are enjoying herself. Mr. Michaelis gently remind everyone that afternoon tea is over. Elizabeth thanked everyone for coming before they part ways. The Innes-Ker children left the room in contentment.

Susan accompany her cousins back to their cabins before she return to her own.

Once she is back in her cabin, Susan set to work. She write down the names of all passengers she acquainted so far. Then she cross check them with the materials she has read in the past, such as the Gazette. Susan memorised them all. It's a crucial skill to have in their line of work. Most of the names written down are passengers of the First Class. It already includes the servants.

How many names in this list who are part of Mme. Samuel's society? Secret societies generally don't have the most stellar reputation. To hold a meeting here… Someone bound to know something. Susan find it hard to believe that they can host a gathering without the backing of an individual (or more) with ties to Blue Star Line. An investigation of her own is in order then. Let's do it after everyone is asleep.

Susan reread the list once more to make sure she didn't make a mistake. Then she rip the paper to pieces.

Leave no evidence behind.

* * *

The children are asleep. So are the grownups. Susan changed into the plainest dress she can find. She tied up her hair to a bun. To complete the look, she even put on a pair of fake glasses. Now she look like someone who would board the Third or Second Class.

If someone ask her, she'll tell them that she is maid, a governess, a typewriter or an an orphan looking for a new lease of life in the New World.

The Second Class is closer, so that's where she headed first. It is less decorated compared to the First Class, but it perfectly suit those from middle class background. Susan couldn't find anything in her first sweep. She'll get back to it after she investigate the Third Class.

The Third Class is a complete 180 compared to the First Class. The dining hall is full to the brim. A sharply dressed young man invite her to join his table. He even pull up a chair for her.

"Thank you," Susan slips an accent to better her disguise.

The young man winked at her. "No problem, dove. Wouldn't want you to get in trouble with less agreeable sort. This is not a place for a kid like you."

"I'm not a child. I'm an adult!" Susan fake an indignant huff. That is what a defensive teenager would say.

"I bet your mother doesn't know you're here. Nothing's wrong with wanting to have a little adventure, of course."

"You don't look much older than me," Susan points out. The man is handsome, with his tousled blond hair and unique eye colour. They are the same colour of the chartreuse Father bought in Paris.

The young man give her an enigmatic smile. "Whatever number you have in mind, you're wrong."

Before Susan know how to respond, the other man on the table ask her a question.

"Have you drunk ale before?" He offer her his pint.

The woman seated next to him shot him a disapproving gaze. "For God's sake, Richard, she's just a kid! And she is definitely not drinking from your pint!"

Susan lean forward eagerly. "Can I try?"

The man laughed and order a pint of ale for her. "My treat."

They watch her take a sip of the ale and laughed when she make a face.

They don't ask for her names and Susan return the favor in kind. They ask her for her reason to board this ship. Susan is prepared for this. She told them her family is emigrating to New York. Clearly they won't believe her if she tell them that she is a governess. A maid, perhaps. She keep the details vague. The other two easily bought it but she has a hunch that the blonde man didn't.

Something about the man just doesn't add up. His clothing is too high quality for someone in the Third Class. She never saw watches with the same design as his in the market. He is not even close to inebriated when their neighbour from the next table challenge him to a drinking competition.

Susan find his story suspicious. He told the table that he was dispatched to Campania by his company to retrieve several misplaced goods of theirs. He didn't say what. Nor did he say anything about New York. That specific wording worry her. Maybe it's due to her paranoia. Or that need to dissect everything that is so quintessentially British.

The man caught her eye _(has she been staring?)_ and winked.

Susan blushed, not out embarrassment but annoyance toward herself for her carelessness.

The sound of bagpipe catch her attention. Susan turn around to see a group of musicians gathering in one spot. Several people got up to dance. Two of their companions left the table to go to the dance floor.

"Not going to dance, dove?" Her last companion put his hands behind his head and lean back.

"I don't know if that's such a good idea." The hesitation is genuine. She still has to work but the temptation to join is real. These kind of dances will never be allowed in the palace or ballrooms.

The man cast an eye to the dance floor. "They do look like they can do this for hours. Are you afraid that your mother will wake up and find you missing from your bed? If you don't want a scolding from your father before breakfast, I suggest you return now."

If she return now, she can still investigate the First Class. Yet Susan did not get up from her seat.

Her companion raises an eyebrow.

"Why aren't you dancing then?" Susan ask him.

He open his mouth to answer, then closes them. She had him there and the man knew it. He grins.

Susan smiles. "You look like sort that won't feel scandalised when the opposite sex invite you to dance."

"Life is too short for that kind of thing," he casually says.

"So that means you'll say yes?"

"Are you asking, dove?"

"I don't think we will ever see each other again," Susan tells him. This man will never know her real name, where she come from, why she did what she did, how she like her coffee, or that she has two brothers. Likewise, she will never know his favourite snack to go along with his tea, the title of the book he promise to read but never does, if he's aware that her accent is fake, why his eyes look so much older. "You're here now."

The man laughs, and then offer her his hand.

Technically she is not on duty.

She want to remember that she is right here, right now.

She is not developing feelings for him.

He knows that too.

They shared a dance, and two, and they would have a third if it weren't for their other companions dragging them to join another group.

Just one more secret for her to keep. And Susan is fine with that.

* * *

Second Class is proven fruitless. No, Susan take back that statement. It was not a waste of time. She at least memorised the general layout of Second and Third Class now. Let's do one sweep at the First Class before she head back to her cabin.

Stepping into the First Class after her time in the Third Class' dining hall feel like a dream. The contrast is too stark.

Susan soften her footsteps, just like how Father taught her all those years ago. If there is anyone out here, she doesn't want to get caught by them.

As expected, the main hall is barred. Susan take a detour to check the other hall. Just in time too. Staffs are going in and out of the entrance. They are in the middle of preparation. Whatever for? Only one party is scheduled for tomorrow.

She is internally debating whether to leave or not when another staff approach. The men eye each other warily before the newcomer strike a pose. The others did the same.

For grown men to make that kind of pose-

Susan had to bite her cheek to keep herself from laughing.

Somehow she doubt that they will let her in just like that even if she do the correct pose. To linger is not a sound idea either. Susan take it as a sign that this is where the investigation will end for today.

Susan turn to walk away from the scene, only to nearly crash into Mr. Michaelis. She almost step back but that would risk being seen. Mr. Michaelis grab her by the waist and pull. Susan let him whisk him away, too stunned to even speak.

How come she didn't notice his presence? He was right behind her!

Mr. Michaelis finally let go of her after they gain considerable distance. "My deepest apologize for grabbing you like that, Honorable Miss. I couldn't risk both of us getting caught," He give her a deep bow.

Susan regain her bearing after being addressed so. "Your apology is accepted, Mr. Michaelis. I thank you for your quick thinking."

She doesn't ask what is he doing out here at this hour. Mr. Michaelis doesn't strike her as the type to 'let loose'. He must be doing some sleuthing on Earl Phantomhive's behalf.

Thankfully he didn't ask about her attire or why she is out here alone.

"There is only a few hours left before breakfast. It is imperative for you to get some rest. Let me escort you back to your cabin," He offers.

Susan nods. "Thank you, Mr. Michaelis."

They start walking to the direction of her cabin.

"For you to stay up this late… Your diligence is most commendable. I take it that your work have begin to bear fruits, Mr. Michaelis?"

The corner of his mouth quirk upwards. "I am merely doing my job, Honorable Miss. Your work ethic is most admirable as well."

"Oh, you are too kind with your praise. I still lack in many areas. Please remember to take care of your health."

"Thank you for your concern. Please do not push yourself, Honorable Miss. The festivity will get even merrier at midnight tomorrow."

 _Ah_

"Oh, I don't doubt that. Our friends back there worked hard to ensure everything will go smoothly."

"Indeed."

"I made a new acquaintance today. She will most likely attend the function you just mentioned tomorrow. She was so kind to inform me that she will receive further treatment in New York."

Susan has no idea if the case Earl Phantomhive is investigating is indeed linked to Madame Samuel's society. But the timing matched. Not to mention Madame Samuel did said that her society have ties in New York.

Mr. Michaelis appear to be processing the information she just given him. "I see. That is interesting."

Susan merely smiles. They leave their conversation at that.

They turn around the corner… And come face to face with Bertram.

He looked livid.

 _"Where have you been?"_ He almost hissed. Her brother cast a suspicious look at Mr. Michaelis' direction. "Were you having secret meetings with him? _A butler?_ "

Susan ignore the implied accusation. "Mr. Michaelis was escorting me back. We bumped into each other in the hallway, brother."

"And just what-" Bertram struggle to keep his voice down. "-are you doing out there?"

Susan study her brother. Bertram look like he's ready to pounce. At her or Mr. Michaelis, she doesn't know. She knows that they must do this at the hallway. She turn to Mr. Michaelis. "You can leave me here. My brother will take me back now. Thank you for your assistance, Mr. Michaelis."

The butler bowed and quickly took his leave.

Once he is out of sight, Bertram grab her by the elbow. "Are you out of your mind?" He almost spits.

"I am still in possession of my sanity. Thank you for asking."

"Thank you- you were having a tryst with a butler! Whom you just met!"

Uh-oh, her brother is working up a tirade.

"Bertram, it's not what you think-"

"What would our parents say?! If you got caught red handed-"

"I didn't-"

"Our family's reputation will be ruined!"

"Bertram-"

"...scandal!"

Susan wrench her arm free. "If you ever grab me like that again, _I will break your finger._ "

Without giving him a chance to respond, or even wait for his reaction, Susan walk past him.

She found Father waiting for her outside her cabin. "Did you find anything?"

"Yes, a lead."

Father nod in approval.

She hear hasty footsteps behind her. Susan didn't need to turn around to tell that it's Bertram. He announce his presence right away.

"Susan- Father!" She can imagine the shock written on his face. "Father! Susan has been-"

Father put up a hand, cutting off Bertram, "I know."

"What?"

"It's not what you're thinking, Bertram."

"But she's-"

"Bertram, I know what this must look like but I can assure you, your sister know what she's doing."

Bertram stare at Father, and then at her. "Well then, what is she doing then, Father? How could you approve?" He crosses his arms.

"Son, please don't take this the wrong way but we can't tell you."

Bertram's jaw dropped. "What- Why- It's my business if my sister went and engage in debauchery like a-"

Susan whip around to face her brother, _"Don't even think of finishing that sentence."_

Bertram glares at her. Before he can retort, Father cut him off. "You will not treat your sister in such manner, Bertram. And you're wrong. What Susan is up to is none of your business."

Her brother loom back and forth between her and their father. _"What's going on?"_

"We can't tell you."

Susan notice her brother's face turn red from anger. He grit his teeth in frustration. "Fine! Have it your way. Bertram get left out once more. It has always been like that." He turn on his heel and enter his cabin. Susan close her eyes when he slam the door.

Father turn to her. "Susan…"

"I'm tired," She cut him off. She is too weary to have this conversation. "Good night, Father."

Susan enter her cabin. She wait by the door until she hear Father enter his cabin.

That was the first time Bertram grabbed her like that. Susan didn't want to resort to bodily harm but she won't let anyone treat her like that. Not even her own brother. It's a good thing that Father step in before the situation escalate even further. But his insistence, their insistence to keep Bertram out of the loop is taking a toll on everyone. Her brother especially. They drove him to this state.

Susan rub her elbow.

Truth to be told, it surprised her that Bertram lasted this long. She always knew that one day his patience will run out and Bertram will start demanding for answers. Answers they keep deny him of.

Given a choice, Susan will tell Bertram everything in a heartbeat. But she couldn't afford to. Not without permission.

Let Susan forever be hated by her own brother as long as he is off suspicion. Bertram must not become collateral damage.

Only he is, just not in the way they feared for.

And that, perhaps, where their biggest mistake lie.

* * *

 **I apologise for taking this long to update. Real life get in a way. That and I got distracted by my other stories.**

 **Can you guess who Susan met while she's hanging out at Third Class?**

 **Innes-Kerr Family Drama~ The root of it is basically lack of communication between all family members. Exactly about what will be revealed in future chapters.**

 **Thank you for reading**

 **Please leave a review**

 **NO FLAME**


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